Increase endorphins, improve sleep, reduce stress, elevate self-esteem and enhance body image. These are just a few benefits of masturbation.
As women, many of us have been led to believe that masturbation is something that only men do, or that there is some level of shame associated with self-pleasure. Often, we’ve been conditioned not to see ourselves as sexual beings and therefore end up outsourcing our pleasure to partnered sex only.
Masturbation, however, is an incredibly healthy practice of sexual expression. After all, even the World Health Organization deems pleasure to be a human right. Most sexual health therapists would agree that everyone deserves to experience deep pleasure and intense orgasms.
Perhaps you’re still masturbating the same way you always have, or maybe you’re not indulging very often but are curious to explore more. Here are 11 top tips by Sensuality Coach, Sex Educator and Sensual Movement Practitioner Eleanor Hadley to improve your self-pleasure routine and get you a one-way ticket to O-town.
1. Set the mood
Being more mindful with your masturbation is a surefire way to make it more pleasurable. Turn the lights down low, put some candles on, play some sexy music and create the right context to allow yourself to slip into pleasure.
2. Take your time
It’s important to allow 20-40 minutes of arousal before any type of penetration (be that fingers, a toy or a penis) in order to allow sufficient blood flow to your genitals which enhances pleasure. So, slow down, don’t rush towards the big O and simply enjoy the journey.
3. Seduce yourself
Sometimes it can be hard for us to get out of our heads and into our bodies. One powerful way to do this is by setting the mood and giving yourself a slow, sensual full body oil massage. This will not only have you totally feeling yourself —metaphorically and literally — but you’ll be awakening sensation throughout your entire body, ultimately leading to a more intense experience of pleasure.
4. Experiment with different positions
It’s all well and good if you have your favourite go-to positions, but without variety we can unintentionally end up conditioning ourselves to only come in one specific way. I’d suggest trying out different positions such as laying on your back, your front, sitting up, standing and any other way to shift your body to find more pleasure.
5. Explore various sensations
Introduce yourself to the world of blended orgasms by adding in different sensations to your usual masturbation routine. Try touching different parts of your body – such as your nipples, neck, thighs and anus – at the same time as stimulating your vagina or clitoris. An old faithful combo is to stimulate the g-spot and the clitoris at the same time. You may find a sex toy such as the Oh My Rabbit Vibrator: Fifty Shades Darker helpful to reach both places at once.
6. Lube up
Using lube increases pleasure, reduces painful friction and intensifies orgasms. Try out Pjur MED Water-Based Natural Glide Lubricant which feels totally natural,making it perfect for use with all types of sex toys.
7. Spice things up with sex toys
Sex toys are such a gift and can be such a powerful way to discover more types of pleasure than you may have known your body was ever capable of! Try something really versatile like the Rave App Controlled 10 Speed G-Spot Vibrator to explore internal and external stimulation – or both at the same time! This vibe will help you find pleasure zones you never knew existed.
8. Practice edging
Edging is an incredible practice to help you experience more intense orgasms. When you feel yourself headed towards your climax, hold yourself back a bit, slow down or move your focus elsewhere. Then take yourself to the edge once more, repeating this pattern until you’re ready to fully let go.
9. Try audio erotica
Many women find that visual pornography doesn’t quite appeal (particularly if it’s made for the male gaze). Enter: Audio Erotica. Apps like Dipsea, Ferly or Quinn offer steamy audio stories to help you get in the zone and spark that desire through fantasy and storytelling. Some even have guided self-pleasure practices to help you map out your personal pleasure zones.
10. Breathe deeply
Channel your sexual energy upwards throughout the body to experience full body orgasms by tuning in and taking long, slow, deep breaths during masturbation. Deep breathing oxygenates your blood and increases blood-flow, resulting in deeper pleasure. So, breathe baby, breathe!
11. Engage in some aftercare
The concept of aftercare comes from the world of BDSM but is something we should all be engaging in after any sexual experience — be it solo or partnered. Rather than hopping up and moving straight on with your day post-O, take some time to bask in that afterglow. Reconnect with your body, have a sip of water, journal, stretch. By staying in that post-orgasm energy for a while, you reaffirm to yourself that your pleasure is a priority. Honour yourself for taking time for you. You deserve it!
This article 11 Expert-Approved Masturbation Tips was originally published on the Women’s Health Australia website.
