By Megan Flemmit; Photography by Unsplash

Much like life, motherhood doesn’t come with an instruction manual.

Motherhood isn’t as simple as following ten quick instructions and ending up with a happy child who has good intentions. There’s also no way to measure if you’re doing a good job. It’s easy to feel discouraged after countless sleepless nights, when your newborn just won’t stop crying or even just trying to get them to eat something.

Throw Instagram into the mix, with it’s deluge of moms who seem to have it together, and you have a recipe for despair. As a new mom, Shannon Hankes knows all to well how overwhelming it can be trying to figure out what the best thing is for your child. She’s come to realise the importance of forgiving yourself when you get things wrong.

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In a post shared to Instagram, Hankes wrote “Moms, I know it’s hard. Having to get up multiple times during the night and in the wee hours of the morning. Having these little people rely on you to keep them alive and nourished. We teach the hard lessons, and try to do the right things. Even when we aren’t sure what the right thing is.”

Moms, I know it’s hard. Having to get up multiple times during the night and in the wee hours of the morning. Having these little people rely on you to keep them alive and nourished. We teach the hard lessons, and try to do the right things. Even when we aren’t sure what the right thing is. Then forgiving yourself when you get it wrong. It’s hard to feel like your world is so small. But, you are their whole world. You are who they need. You have the soul to love them, not just on their hard days, but your hard days too. Even when you are exhausted, you have the heart to wake up every morning and do it all over again. On the days you feel like you can’t make it, just remember you can. And that this is just a season in life. You blink and they are 8. Then 28. And then they are parents, resembling a you, you once were. So take it in, mama. Let them climb into bed with you any hour of the night. Sing that song they requested for the 10th time. Hold them a little tighter when all they want is to shower with you and feel your skin against theirs. Maybe in raising children you lose your mind a little bit. But, boy, do you find your soul! Embrace the exhaustion. The overwhelming. The hard days. And all the joy. #motherhoodunplugged #lovewhatmatters

A post shared by Shannon Hankes (@dailyhankesmischief) on Apr 2, 2017 at 2:21pm PDT

And what the right thing is comes down to perspective. Celebrity moms like Beyonce, Kim Kardashian and Chrissy Teigen have all faced criticism, from wearing revealing clothes to leaving their kids at home while going out. It seems as though everyone has an opinion on what it means to be a good mom.

READ MORE: These 4 Signs Could Indicate That You Have Postpartum Depression

While it’s easy to feel insecure about your parenting abilities, Hankes wants you to know that you are doing a great job. She explains that the incredible thing about motherhood is that you have the ability to keep going. “You have the soul to love them, not just on their hard days, but your hard days too. Even when you are exhausted, you have the heart to wake up every morning and do it all over again. On the days you feel like you can’t make it, just remember you can.”

And she reminds moms how quickly time passes and urges them to cherish every moment they’re able to spend with their children. “You blink and they are 8. Then 28. And then they are parents, resembling you, as you once were. So take it in, mama. Let them climb into bed with you any hour of the night. Sing that song they requested for the 10th time. Hold them a little tighter when all they want is to shower with you and feel your skin against theirs”, she wrote.

Struggling to stay away from society’s idea of what mothers should do? Read how pressure for this mom to breastfeed led to her infant’s death, plus this super-fit mom just got real about her postpartum body.